Dare to dream...

Dreaming isn't a hobby anymore - it's an asset. And a mighty valuable one at that. If you got it, you might have the world at your feet. No less. There were days when dreaming was not considered a real talent. Now instead of realistic generalists we look for dream specialists who have the vision and imagination to lead us where no man, woman or child has ventured before.

The entire talent and industry of dreaming rests on a special kind of mind that can disconnect itself from current difficulties and fly off to uncharted territories at a moment's notice. That can see the unseen and hear the unheard. It can paint with no colors and brighten without light. That's the power of dreaming...and dreamers.

Dreaming big is even better. These are special souls who can dare to disregard a dingy life and dream of achievements that score an 'impossible' on the harsh measures of reality. These dreamers make us believe there is a spectacular life yet to be lived. If only we believe.

Here lies that golden key to dreaming for success. Believe and all can be yours. What you see is what you get. Honestly. So we better dream big because no one knows if all that could be ours by morning.

And why not end this piece with my own quote: "The art of dreaming is a different talent than the art of doing. Though one without the other remains unfulfilled."

Contentedness is in fashion...

Some years ago, I sat in a training program to observe the goings on. The theme was goal-setting. A clueless trainee with a dash of doubt said he wanted to be 'content' in life. The trainer locked their critical eyes on the participant and derisively declared that being content led to complacency and that was no goal at all.

I shuddered till my smallest vertebra and realized I must be in the wrong program or in a bad dream. One of those. What a gross misuse of one's position to distort the true meaning of being contented in life. And since when have we become critical of being happy and at peace with what we have, anyway?

I guess it is this mad world we live in that moves at speeds not yet calculable, and wipes out anything that fails to keep pace. En route it creates a monster of our mind and plays tricks on our imagination to make us feel less of a person if we weren't in a tearing hurry 24x7.

There is an archaic meaning of the word 'content' that meant, 'willing'. What if being content translated into a willingness to move forward with energy, enthusiasm, and enlightenment about the way forward. What if being content is a prerequisite to doing anything meaningful in our lives. Because frenzy and desperation seem to layer our life with more unhappiness. Worse still - our urge to conform to our rapidly changing world pushes us into a much more depressing state than even unhappiness. It's called emptiness.

I can't help thinking why so many high flying, high earning, fast paced, globe trotting professionals are as lonely as they seem to be. Try looking deeper into their eyes at an airport next time, and you will see what I mean.

And then again. There are those who are superbly successful and brilliantly happy! How did that happen? Maybe, they have cracked the puzzle of the most important goals in life. I am placing my bets on being contented and happy with what they got. No wonder success and more of everything just pours into their lives!

I feel so hipped about being contented in life that I think it is an enduring fashion statement. This draining frenzy must be a fad...hopefully, it will pass.

How not to get frustrated at work...

Our boss is not the worst person we ever worked for and neither is our client as cut-throat as we imagine. Most of all we are responsible for our bad health and unhappiness at work.We deceive ourselves when we say things like, 'that's how my industry works, I can't help it' or 'everyone around me is going through the same thing', or better still, 'I guess that's the price one pays to earn big bucks in tough competition.' WRONG.

Just a few days back, one of my good friends vented about their bad work schedules. The person was disillusioned, disappointed, and tired of their work life though they loved their job content.Here are a few things that might prove useful. Do take some time out to think about your own work situation.

What makes us frustrated? 

- Unable to get proper rest
- Eating quick meals or junk food
- Not able to spend time with family
- Killing ones hobbies
- Not able to socialize with friends
- Coming home too tired to even think

After getting burnt much more than once, I devised my own plan for what I call....'Healthy Work Ethic'.

Healthy Work Ethic

1. Understand the limits of your own body and health status. Knowing what you are capable of and your own physical limits seriously helps in deciding  your work priorities. You will be at peace refusing some kinds of work even if it means you might miss out on a few rewards.

2. It is all very well to say work and life should be the same, and yet when one spills over into the other it causes such disruption. Why not make a list of things that you really value in your personal life outside your work. Keep this list where you can see it everyday.

3. Make an effort to pursue your hobbies that made you happy in the past. I used to paint before I got into a job. Then I forgot about it for years. Suddenly, I realized what a joy it was to paint, and I began again. It helped me greatly in restoring my balance.

4. Balance out need and greed. If we get greedy instead of being ambitious we lose our way in the maze of the professional world. How much is too much? I discovered that being contented is good, it gives me perspective.

5. Create a social circle away from your office folks. Don't let your friend circle begin and end at work. Instead, find a club or a social cause or a professional group like Rotary that gives you an out when it comes to socializing. It can make a huge difference to our happiness.

6. Don't wait for someone to say how hard you work and they appreciate it. It is seriously frustrating for anyone to not hear that for long periods. Draw the line yourself. Know that you are doing your best and you need to look out for your health as well.

7. Know your non-negotiables. What are those top few things that you will not give up on no matter what. Think hard about this list. It makes all the difference. In fact, saying no becomes less tough once you know your reasons for declining work or opportunities.

Hope this helps, and do let me know if any of this works for you. :-)

Top FIVE mental energy wasters

Here's my list of top five energy eaters and wasters. These are thoughts and actions that can leave us seriously exhausted. And take away the positive and useful energy that we need in our life everyday.

ONE: Negative Talk: Though this list is not in ranking order, thinking, feeling, speaking, and finally, acting negatively is one of the most tiring things in the world. Literally. Prolonged negativity causes stress that can release hormones that in turn exhaust us or worse still - cause illnesses. So potent are the effects of negativity on our bodies.
What can you do? The mind has doors that only you can open. Refuse to open the lock when negativity comes knocking. Be strong and divert your attention through a book, music, talking, movies, cooking, running, meditating.....anything.

TWO: Jealousy: Not just is jealousy a major waste of good energy it is a complete waste of our time. Think about it - what do we achieve anyway? Not just do we not get what the other person has, we also begin downgrading what we already have. Now that's an unfair deal.
What can you do? Write down five things you are utterly proud of in your own life. These could date back to school days even. Read the list aloud and absorb its impact on your mind and spirit. It works.

THREE: Worrying and Brooding: I read somewhere long ago that 99% of what we worry about never comes true. I tested it out and found this to be a fact. Logically, the time we waste in worrying about a hypothetical situation could have been invested in making the current situation a great one.
What can you do? Get logical about worrying. Worrying is an irrational activity - so ask yourself, what is fact and what is fiction? And what if the worst case scenario did really happen?

FOUR: Blaming: Not just others, but blaming oneself and taking too much responsibility is a draining mental activity. It creates negativity and helplessness - both of which tire us out mentally. God helps those who help themselves - is not just a spiritual thought, but a psychological one, too!
What can you do? Talk to yourself when you feel wronged before you talk to anyone else. Most probably, we do have a hand in our own pain. Once we address that with courage, others seem lesser culprits.

FIVE: Feeding Fear: Nothing blows things more out of proportion than fear. It could range from fear of losing our image to fear of losing money or health. But fear drives us like nothing else. And it also robs us of precious energy that we absolutely need to fire our imagination and passion.
What can you do? Figure out one small fear and get over it. Just one tiny one. The sense of elation is worth experiencing. That one small step makes other fears seem less towering.

Do commitments matter?

I've been asking myself this question very often these days - do commitments and promises mean anything anymore? They once did, when our grandparents gave their word and kept it, even if it meant making personal sacrifices to do what they had promised to do.

It has been my professional experience in recent times that commitments and their value has seriously declined. So, someone says something to me with unflinching conviction the evening before and we settle on a plan, and the next day they don't bat an eyelid before doing a 180 degree! I had a colleague talking to me on the phone reporting similar incidents and asking me if that's how the 'corporate world' worked? Or are they missing something here?

Both for their and my sake, I focused on people who have taught me through their brilliant example that not everyone in our corporate world is the same. I have had the good fortune to learn from senior leaders no less that it doesn't take that much to keep commitments. A simple, "Sonali, I can't promise anything right now and we'll talk after a week", works just as well.

I guess people often promise things because they find it awkward to tell you otherwise. Especially, in our Asian culture. But isn't that a painful way to say, 'No'?

So next time you know you don't know for sure....say so. It will save a lot of explanations and apologies, but more importantly, it will tell the other person that you are a man or a woman of integrity. Who keeps their word. Even in this age.

Don't sell yourself short...

I am especially inspired to write this one because it's not often that anyone tells us to do otherwise. That is, sit us down and warn us about the danger of selling ourselves short.

On the contrary, most people settle for less thinking that things will get better once they buy into the initial idea. No, things don't get better, they get worse (and if you don't do something today, they might stay that way). Maureen Dowd put it brilliantly, "The minute you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for!"

Look around in your life - your workplace - your friends - your bank balance - your health - and ask yourself.....have you settled for less than what you deserve?

When I graduated from my MBA in the late nineties, I didn't come out with a job in hand - it was a downturn of major proportions. I finally found one with a tiny co. that offered me a pittance to work as an HR fresher in their utterly uninspiring work place. I know why I got a sorry job - because I had convinced myself that it was a bad market and all great jobs were taken and no one would pay me what I deserved anyway.

But somewhere....deep down in my heart, a spark of common sense said - why am I doing this to myself? My parents didn't get me this far for nothing. Believe me, but the very next day, I saw an ad in the papers ( my blind eyes finally began seeing opportunities that were worth my while). The new Indian Institute of Management, Indore, needed an Academic Associate in the area of Organizational Behavior. And they were paying a good amount, too. I sat dumbstruck! This was perfect for me. In a matter of weeks, I had got my dream job! I got the job amongst many other candidates because I was so determined to get it. In fact, I worked harder than I can recall for a 15 minute interview. I still have pages full of preparation notes from there.

I think the person offering us something they know we don't deserve can be easily blamed, but we are to be blamed equally if we accept that offer. If you want to be treated fairly or get what you deserve then set the tone, so others know what you expect. There is nothing noble about being silent or hesitate to talk about what's good for you. And we are not just talking about material things here!

All spiritual literature of the world tells us we have an indisputable divine spark within us. And when we settle for less, that spark dies slowly but surely until we do become like everyone else.

Instead, learn to value yourself. We ARE unique in what we are capable of doing. Even if we feel just like others on the surface or the competition seems immense, or the market is bad. There is a special spark if you choose to ignite it and let it be seen by others.

So, start today and find that something exciting and special about you. If you won't -who else will?

Step 10 - Becoming Super Leaders - Share your success

STEP 10: Share your Success with Team Members

I feel like we have come full circle today starting from Step 1, which said - Think differently and rapidly move to action. The last step is about how to share our success with others.

The Challenge: Leaders are not necessarily villains that don't want to share. But spreading out the good stuff takes special effort, well thought out communication, and public displays of appreciation.

The Key: Start small. Do what's important on a daily basis when it comes to giving credit. Doesn't take half an hour to share success - just two minutes. Literally.

3 Practical Ideas
Mean what you say: Sharing successes with team members is certainly not about what we say, but how we say it and if it means much. I valued my boss sticking his head in my cubicle and giving me one sentence of positive feedback. It made my day. I didn't necessarily grudge him not naming me the employee of the month. The fact that he believed what he was saying had a strong effect on us as a team.

Create informal channels: Often, leaders create a bulletin board with employee of the month pinned on it, or send a mail to their team applauding that one member who contributed significantly. It brings the spotlight on the right person, and creates a healthy environment in the team. That is - if you picked the right person to appreciate. This is also a powerful idea. You can send a brief mail about how one or more than one team member added to the success of an initiative. And cc important people on the mail.

Praise in Public: I love this thumb rule someone taught me ages ago. Praise in public, criticize in private. While we make team members a greater part of team success, it's really important to keep this tip in mind as well. If we have a kind word to say, might as well say it within hearing shot of others!

These and many other ways that I am sure you will devise on your own lead to SUPER LEADERSHIP on a daily basis. It is the excitement of doing that which is not garden variety leadership. I wish you all best luck and many great milestones on the path to super leadership.

Cheers to being leaders!

Refreshingly old....

A few months ago, I met a couple in their late sixties who knew me since I was a kid. I was meeting them after twenty-five long years, and it was.......an utter and absolute shock! They looked as fit as a couple of fiddles can possibly look. Though much more than that they seemed happy, radiant, and at peace.

I thought of my back ache from the previous day and drowned in a generous puddle of inferiority. Are they reverse lying about their age? Nope, they couldn't be younger even if they did have a warped sense of humor to let lose on unsuspecting juniors like me. "They are indeed in their late sixties", mom whispered conspiratorially.

I heard their interesting stories, got sentimental about loss and sorrow, felt excited simply because they were excited about their five grandchildren, and smiled hugely for no reason at all the rest of the time.

Finally, I couldn't stop myself from asking the secret of their exuberant health and life. So tell me....how, what, when, how come? Their answer was as forthright as the rest of their conversations had been that evening. They stunned me with their revelation - just two years ago they weren't so healthy or happy! Mr.X couldn't get out of bed in the mornings as spondylitis made inroads into his body. And Mrs.X had vertigo and general joint pains. Most old people might pop a couple pills and pull the blanket closer around their aging bodies.

Not them. This couple did something that must have taken gallons of willpower and tons of courage. They took a decision to drive to a public park at 5:00 am and brisk walk for one solid hour. Then followed it up with five simple breathing exercises and five simple yoga asanas. And they did this every single morning. Until.....pain, discomfort, and obvious signs of aging left them for greener pastures.

That evening spent with the courageous couple has had a profound effect on me. Do I have the gumption to do what they have brilliantly done already? Is a question I have asked myself several times already. Not that I have an option but to follow in their foot steps because my wondering just wouldn't stop.

Maybe, waking up at 5:00am will help!

Step 9 - Becoming Super Leaders - Develop Wisdom

STEP 9: Develop wisdom not just about work, but your organization

Many of us can be very smart about how to run our team, but if asked about the position of the organization as a whole, we might be clueless.

The Challenge: Tunnel vision is an occupational hazard in the corporate world. What we do becomes our world, why we do it takes a backseat most times.

The Key: Keep your ear to the ground. Maybe, we need to listen more, speak less. When we have thinking time is when we develop wisdom.

3 Practical Ideas:
Listen: When I trained freshers in professional skills, I often quoted my own example as a brand new employee. I listened a lot and tried speaking less when I knew I did not know enough. It helped me enormously, first in understanding my team, my boss, and eventually where my organization was positioned in the larger scheme of things. This knowledge was very useful during my career with the organization.

Share: Talking to those you are comfortable sharing information with creates a healthy exchange. Insights can strike when two heads put together what seems like disjointed organizational information. Speak with others, engage in meaningful conversations. Ask some intelligent questions about the business. What you figure out and understand will undoubtedly help in elevating the quality of your own work and output.

Keep your ear to the ground: I've observed that progress in an organization is directly proportional to having access to useful information. Keep your ear to the ground literally means listening for clues to gauge the health of the organization. Read the press releases, but more importantly understand the background and the ground reality of what's behind the information you read. Those who are wise about their organization are also the pioneers of new initiatives and focused efforts.

I began this series with wisdom about our self, but along the way it has become more evident to me how we need to be more clued in to what ever it is we choose to pursue.

Coming up next: The last one - Step 10: Make every team member benefit from success

Step 8 - Becoming Super Leaders - Have a life

STEP 8: Have a Life of your Own

How many here have worked so hard that you didn't have time for the most important person in your life - yourself? The reason I say 'you' are most important is because you need to be in good health first, so you can be useful to others in your life. How's your personal life and health meter doing?

The Challenge: Hectic schedules. Busy work. Rapid life. Clients. Employees. Children. Spouse. Pets. Demands. Results...and the list goes on.

The Key: Think. I mean, think real hard. I have discovered that thinking is the root of all solutions, and the lack of it the root of all our mess! Hmmm

3 Practical Ideas:
Think: Even if you have only five minutes to spare, ask yourself, why are you doing what ever it is you are doing? Is killing your health, your life, your joy - worth in the larger scheme of things? The answer could be a surprising, 'yes'. Because a lot of us justify and reason out why we are are skirting the edge of self-destruction. How would life look if balance became a big part of our daily agenda? What would your day look like if you learned to say 'No'?

Challenge: Why is earning so much more money than we seriously need so important? It's a brilliant idea to challenge various assumptions such as the one I just quoted. Are we happy that the childhood hobby we had is extinct today? If we aren't then it is time to challenge what we consider 'critical' in our life. What is the value of family in our life? We all love them, but what does love mean? I think it also means giving them time. You see, unless we challenge our assumptions, status quo will be very happy to stay.

Realign: Once you get through the first two steps with even reasonable amounts of success, it is time to begin realigning, repositioning, and rejuvenating. Get frank about what you are capable of doing and what you aren't. Shift your job if you have to  - really, I mean. Go on vacations, talk to real people, switch off phones, smile more, stress less, and drink loads of water!

Sounds simple. Looks tough. Feels beyond reach. Works wonders. Try it out for yourself, and tell me if it doesn't work.

Coming up next: Step 9: Have wisdom about your work and your organization

Step 7 - Becoming Super Leaders - Forge Partnerships

STEP 7: Forge Unimaginable Partnerships with Competitors

This is not just about giants like Microsoft and IBM partnering with each other. How about you as a leader recognizing the need to do so? A lot of leaders have no dearth of talent or knowledge, but very few have the ability to see how others can enhance their leadership mandate.

The Challenge: Personal security v/s professional opportunities.

The Key: We anyway never lived in a world where partnerships didn't matter, but now we can't survive without them.

3 Practical Ideas:
Focus on the gaps: This seems counter-intuitive to even me saying - focus on your strengths. Well, that's what works most of the time. Unless you are a leader in these changing times, where ignoring gaps can cost business opportunities. However, what might be the outcome if the gaps were addressed through partnerships. Rather than taking precious time away from honing, highlighting, and selling your best strengths, it makes far more sense to partner with someone who compensates for the gaps.

Ego issues are passe: Much has been spoken about how huge egos throw the spanner in the works. If self-importance was a (misplaced) mark of a leader in the olden days, then personal security is the latest fashion which is here to stay. It is to a leader's credit to accept, acquire, and appreciate meaningful partnerships.

Grow in partnerships: We aren't doing any favors when we partner with others. Because they in turn are enabling high growth for us. We are able to reach pockets of opportunities that we never thought possible.

Partnerships are not just about sharing resources, they are more importantly about forging bonds.

Coming up next: Step 8: Have a life of your own

The value of dumb ideas

There was an interesting phase in my life when I wanted to become a newscaster. These were the days when local/ city cable networks were all the rage. It's just that in my case, we are talking about a slightly dodgy and decidedly uninspiring cable network that had a weird name.

Back then this was a way out ambition, but Dad being the man he was rooted for his daughter to become the next big thing on TV. (Irrespective of what teenagers think, I always knew there was a higher purpose God gave us parents. Really.)

To my shock, the channel took me on. I had the world at my feet....that is, until I laid eyes on the news content. So we had cows creating a traffic jam on one of our arterial roads up against the amount of pot holes that were threatening to become craters. The animated debate was about which news was headline worthy. Mercifully, we hadn't been introduced to 'breaking news' back then - or I might have quit on day one.

I was disappointed that we didn't have a rotten scam or a sensational jail break to report - and that cows weren't quite my thing. I read some news anyway, while they showed random mucky footage of the city. Next day, Dad asked me to be better dressed if I wanted to enter the media industry and learn from our Door Darshan (India's beloved national channel) newscasters who were spiffy at all times. Hmm....he had a point. So, I got decked up the next day and read some more irrelevant stuff. My father's bravado lasted longer than me at the TV channel.

As I walked out on my short-lived media stint I realized something tremendous that has permanently stayed with me. I guess Dad always knew the fate of this particular idea. Yet he saw how much I believed in it, and supported me without a moment's hesitation. In his wisdom he knew it wasn't the idea that was important, but my passion was worth protecting.

So when someone tells me about an uninspiring brain wave, I choose to support their passion. Ideas come and go. Passion is rare.

Step 6 - Becoming Super Leaders - Be entrepreneurial

STEP 6: Be Entrepreneurial and not just an Employee

We've all been there. Feeling like cogs in the wheel and wondering when the day would end, so we could go home and do more enjoyable stuff.

The Challenge: Being entrepreneurial at work is often misunderstood to be an oxymoron. If I had to be entrepreneurial, I mean, why would I want to do it for someone else's co.? Good question.

The Key: Being entrepreneurial is more a mind-set than a set of actions alone. What we do is very important, but what we think is utterly critical.

3 Practical Ideas:
Make it personal: The moment we focus our energy and our reasoning on our team, our boss, or the organization - we have squandered our power and resources. What makes work feel like our own is when we let ourselves be the key person driving our career. And one bad appraisal shouldn't change that dramatically! Entrepreneurship begins in the mind. Make your work something to cherish. A work of art, something you can take real pride in.

Be Passionate: What's work without a healthy dollop of passion. What helps you immensely with tip no. one is to feel that passion for doing a great job. Mind you, am  not asking you to be passionate about your co. or every HR policy ever made. What level of excellence can you contribute to your team's objectives? Say no to shoddy work and do what you do so well that your boss and your boss's boss has to sit up and take notice. Now that's acting like an entrepreneur because those who toe the line never get noticed. Believe me.

Show Results: When you run your own enterprise, there is a hunger to make things happen. What can you do at work that will show results? Take a paper and a pen and note down the 'useless' parts of your everyday work. Think of how you can waste the least amount of time on them. What are the real 'high value' and 'high impact' parts of your work - and how can you focus on them more? Results speak volumes. The rest becomes easy.

Once you act more like an owner of your work and less like a paid employee to get to someplace vague, life will change. But more importantly, how others treat you will change dramatically. Are you up to the challenge?

Coming up next: Step 7: Forge unimaginable tie-ups with competitors

The secret of being happy

In the year 1996, I stumbled upon my first self-help book - 'The Power of Positive Thinking' - written by Dr.Norman Vincent Peale in 1952. Anyone here remembers it...do tell?

I was swept off of my feet by his brutally honest, heart warming, simply written, and enormously wise book. In one graceful gesture I was introduced to the world of PMA - Positive Mental Attitude!

He was a popular pastor who understood the basic craving of all mankind - to be happy! And stay happy. (I will not get into how we manage to make the "being happy" part so complicated that, by default, we create gob fulls of unhappiness! Let me leave this ripe topic for another blog, another day.)

Getting back to the point. That one tiny book had a gigantic effect on my hungry mind and raw soul. I truly began to believe in the power of positive thinking. Now in the good old days, it was tough to gather various contradictory and debatable points of view on how to be happy. I found one and I stuck with it. Before I could doubt his theory, I had already begun to implement it and the results cemented my belief in the idea of being a good and positive person.

Somewhere in the book, and this is seriously sweet, the author actually offers a numbered list of ingredients we must have in our life to ensure long-term happiness. I have no clue why, but two 'must haves' from his list stayed with me - 1) We must have a purpose in life, and 2) We must have love in our life - someone to love and someone to love us back.

Over a period of time, I read loads of self-help literature out of interest and intrigue about how the mind worked and what powers lay hidden in the infinite human potential. I got submerged in the psychology, anatomy, physiology, and management of a happy and fulfilling life. Many theories came and many went - many have gathered momentum.

Somehow, Dr. Normal Vincent Peale, and his humane and simple approach to happiness, has stuck. Without any frills or fancy - the man knew what he was talking about - and had the courage to say so. I was sold.

After fifteen years of ups and downs, of winning and losing, of knowing and doubting - those two ingredients of being happy have stood the test of time.

So I do know there is unhappiness and suffering in the world, but I also believe that the comfort of a steady purpose and the strength of love are far more potent forces. Not to mention, all that is evil and all that is good in our world, begins in the mind, anyway.

PS: Just in case http://normanvincentpeale.wwwhubs.com/

Step 5 - Becoming Super Leaders - What's your business?

STEP 5: Treat your Division like your own Business

I remember doing a program for GMs and senior managers of a company. And when I asked them some key questions about who owned their divisions - I got seriously blank looks. Most leaders don't consider their division/area/department to be their own thing.

The Challenge: If we are in a job we do act like employees. It takes special initiative to act unlike one and more like an owner. The question is - if I am to act like an owner, why aren't I one?? That's a good question.

The Key: When you treat your job as your 'own thing', you are not just helping the owners, you are helping your career far more than you can imagine.

3 Practical Ideas:
What do YOU want: Have you ever discovered why you don't feel like waking up all bright and bushy-tailed and rushing off happily to work? My guess is because your work seems like a pain - for so many reasons that we might fall short of space on this tiny blog. Jokes apart, it takes so much out of people when their work is not enjoyable. Those who run their own business feel the joy of bringing up a kid almost. So, what stops us from getting into the details of what makes our division tick? What is our equation with the customers, where does the money come in and where does it go? The program I spoke of earlier had many leaders who worked very hard everyday, but lost money for their divisions - without even realizing it! Traditionally, the boss calls the shots, but in reality - they are bound by our commitment or lack of it, for that matter.

What is at stake? What do you lose when you treat your job like a job? Something you are paid to do, but not paid to commit to. You might be surprised that the maximum loss is ours. First we lose our motivation, then opportunities, and finally, money. And aren't these the key reasons we work for anyways. It's important to ask what's at stake here? I believe the idea of working is much less to do with money and way more to do with an inner satisfaction that makes us believe we are contributing to something larger than us.

Where are you headed? Finally, the idea of treating work like our own venture is about what we want to achieve. I've had innumerable participants tell me that their ultimate goal was to become the head of their division or company. And yet they seemed to be doing nothing to contribute to that goal in fact, their actions were counter-productive almost. So, if we have the ambition to make it big someday, we better make it big today - in what ever job we are, which ever position we hold, and which ever country we call home.

There are two ways to be an entrepreneur - to run our own show or run our jobs like they were our own show.

Coming up next: Step 6: Be entrepreneurial than just an employee 

Step 4: Becoming Super Leaders - Revolutionary streams

STEP 4: Creating Revolutionary Streams of Business

I spoke in 'step 1' about creating a new application for your core strength. How can you apply what you are great at in a different area? If you are a fantastic sales person, what new areas of work can you apply your skills to? Could you be selling something new in an un-thought-of territory for a brand new product, and therefore, increase your area of influence.

The Challenge: What we are good at are also things we are mentally comfortable with. Generally speaking, of course. We keep doing the same thing because that's what we have done the most of. The dilemma of specialization v/s diversification. How much is too much?

The Key: The Apple way! Apple is a tremendous example of creating revolutionary products and business streams around their core strength - Innovation!

3 Practical Ideas:
Look to the future: Sounds obvious, and you will still be surprised how many of us don't. Most often as individuals and businesses we choose to look back at our past to gather data. To know what worked in the past seems like a natural action when deciding what 'could' work in the future. But the challenge of our current times is a different ball game altogether - and the answers don't lie in the past. The past, though not irrelevant, can be misleading. TATA Motors did not not consider Tier 3 cities or the rural market as their primary market. That is, until they came up with the little Nano! The common man's car is selling in the rural market more than anyone ever imagined, including the co.

Establish your True core strength: What are you seriously....fantastically good at? I am a trainer, so I am good at training, could be my answer. When I think deeper I know this is far from the truth. Training is not my core competence - understanding myself and extending that skill to understand others is my real strength. And I work mighty hard on it. So, what's your core strength - is it selling, speaking, treating patients, researching, designing? Or is it a deeper strength that enables you to do all the above and holds the promise of diversification, of extending your reach, of creating a business you never thought possible. I wrote a book because that seemed a natural extension of my core skill, not as tough as you might think because I had already worked on the raw material for fifteen years.

Be creative not competitive: When I experience someone interrupting another, so their point can be heard better, I am reminded of a beautiful thing I read long back. A participant wrote in their feedback - 'I stopped taking notes because if my point is worth anything it will survive the conversation and I will remember it.' What a great example of being creative and not competitive. What do you truly, and from your heart, want to have, do, and be irrespective of others around? Revolutionary streams of business and doing what hundred other businesses are doing don't go hand in hand. What unique combination of you as a person, your core strength, your idea, and your initiative can you bring to the table? That - if you can pull it off - is magic!

Revolutionary streams of business are not so revolutionary if you think about it. They are a natural evolution of your core strength polished to perfection.

Coming up next: Step 5: Treat your department as your own business venture

The day I learned to meditate...

I have never learned how to meditate, in the technical sense of the word, I mean. Oxford describes the word 'Meditate' as: "Focus one's mind for a period of time, in silence or with the aid of chanting, for religious or spiritual purposes or as a method of relaxation." Then in finer text below (and more importantly, I think) it says, "think deeply about (something)."

And that something clicked into place.

Some years ago my mind was in considerable turmoil. And the more I pressed for answers the more I came up with disappointments. I was in despair at how I had worked my ineffective lifestyle, fueled by my relentless work schedule, to a point of no return.

And then it happened. I burnt-out, I mean. Just for the sake of info, Oxford defines that as: "In a state of physical or mental collapse caused by overwork or stress." Now that meaning hit home right away.

And when my body broke down, I was forced to switch off my mobile, my laptop, my mind, my friends, my bosses, my TV, and anything and anyone who could speak even a word to me. I spent a good one week lying in bed - thinking! 

That was deep thinking - the deepest I have felt in my life. I soul searched, dug for answers, faced my demons, allowed myself to feel pathetic about my mistakes, and dared to accept the path that was obvious if I wanted to set things right. Though I have to say, the most intoxicating part of that one week was....to have felt nothingness. I came in touching distance of what it must feel to be in a spiritual state of mind. That thrill is tough to describe in words.

That one week of cutting myself off from humanity and being silent felt so right - and so timely. I felt meditative for the first time in my life. Clarity hit home with a vengeance. And I had learned to meditate.

Since then, I have accepted, with great humility, a different approach to indecision and persistent questions. Instead of talking and hunting actively for information - I have learned to shut down the machinery and peripherals of my life that are otherwise constantly whirring.

After all, as Alan Cohen says, "If you want to find God, hang out in the space between your thoughts."

PS: Just in case you get curious about Alan Cohen   http://alancohen.wwwhubs.com/

Step 3: Becoming Super Leaders - Integrity

STEP 3 - Exercise Unquestionable Integrity

Warren Bennis, the illustrious leadership thinker and researcher, revealed that more leaders lose their jobs because of character flaws than due to lack of technical skills. Also, his list of five qualities of great leaders places Trust way above Intelligence or Technical skills. Definite food for thought this.

The Challenge: Integrity, honesty, transparency - all of these are intangibles that are generally not well defined as part of our KRAs or Key Result Areas. Not to mention, the pressure of our work life pushes these finer aspects of business to the back burner.

The Key: Avoid doing things in private we might be ashamed to admit in public. Simple. Effective.Does take effort and willpower, I admit.

3 Practical Ideas:
Relate to people as people: Our relationship with our team at work takes on a brand new meaning when we consider them people first and then co-workers, employees, vendors etc. This 'real' connectedness with others at work encourages our mind to discriminate between right and wrong a bit better. We can be unfair to a cog in the wheel much easier than we can to a person whom we relate to and who respects us back.

Being fair v/s being truthful: A lot of managers say to me that they can't possibly be truthful all the time. What if the information is confidential, we can't share that with anyone? Fair enough. From my own experience of being a team member, I always looked up to bosses who were frank about their inability to share beyond a point. At the same time, they gave us a road map to follow and openly asked us to improvise on current practices. I don't remember any of us hammering on their door for unfairness. So, let's broaden the idea of integrity. It can mean you can be honest to your team on several levels. Tell them that you can't tell them! Or give a time when you can speak to them more frankly. Or share what you think should be the course of action all things considred.

Long-term v/s short-term gains: We can be ahead of ourselves in being shrewd leaders and even then, history tells us that what goes around comes around. Playing games with our team or customers comes right back to bite us. So, what are we gunning for as leaders? List 1) popularity, liking, approval, promotions, getting our way? Nothing wrong with any of that, just that the above priorities motivate us to do things we might not be proud of. What if we prioritize goals such as - list 2) fairness, dynamism, innovation, respect, customer referrals, repeat clientele, and learning and development. Interestingly list two leads to list one - it's inevitable!

Integrity is a personal decision that has little to do with our work place. The question is, who are we becoming as we confidently march towards leadership success?

Coming up next: Step 4: Creating revolutionary streams of business

The Importance of being Harry!

Am talking of the 'chosen one' - Harry Potter!

I remember borrowing The Sorcerer's Stone many years ago from a lending library after someone highly recommended it, and that it was a hit abroad. I'd never heard of it before, but read it anyway. Got hooked. For good. For years. Still am.

When I retire at, lets' say, ninety -  I picture myself in a recliner on a beach, reading HP through my thick glasses and sipping hot tea. Super cool.

Honestly, I don't feel sad that this is the last Harry Potter movie. And don't understand why this should be the end either. The end of what?? The novelty of special effects and cinematic experience of the books, maybe. But how can a series with an enduring plot like this one ever end?

JK Rowling has given us - and several coming generations - a huge gift. One that unabashedly reminds us of the ultimate triumph of good over evil. And that we can win the world - if only we could have on our side, the unrivaled strength of loyalty, personal integrity, and the ultimate powers of Love and Selflessness.

Some might say - that's an idealist's dream - works only in books. I want to believe otherwise. Maybe, our one huge hope in the current times is to re-learn the importance of being loyal, steadfast, honest, and good. As good as Harry! You never know - we just might win this war against the dementors and death eaters of our own muggle world. 

Ms. JK Rowling. Please don't stop writing. We need a lot of reminders still.

Step 2 - Becoming Super Leaders - Team Partnerships

STEP 2: Create Partnerships within your Team 

In my entire career I might have worked with a handful of bosses who were spectacular at forging partnerships with us. We really felt like their TEAM, and not subordinates. Do you agree that one great boss changes our entire perspective about our job, the organization, and esp., our longevity with the co.? One great quality that makes a leader a super leader is treating the team like partners.

The Challenge: Leadership comes with a built-in mechanism that makes it distinct and pegs it a few notches above the others. It takes a sound character and solid conviction to break away from the mindset of traditional leadership. 

The Key: Remind yourself often that people are not working for you, they are working with you. Leadership is about creating positive partnerships.  

3 Practical ideas:  

Be authentic than authoritarian. I was recently invited to attend a women’s meeting, and I was struck by how honest these women were in spite of not knowing everyone there. Very soon the entire room got excited and talking about meaningful issues they wanted to resolve. Was quite a learning – be true to yourself before you expect anyone else to be honest. Partnerships thrive in an environment of honesty.

Process to purpose oriented. Have you ever been upset with an airline staff that told you your flight got canceled or your baggage got lost or they can’t accommodate your family in the same row without telling you why exactly you were being made to suffer? A genuine reason/purpose goes a long way in winning support than slapping people with policies. Ask yourself as a leader today – what is the purpose of my leading this team? What is the purpose of the work we do together? You might surprise yourself with the answers.    

Move from inactive to influential. Don’t you just love people who genuinely ask you, ‘how are you doing’, and actually care about your response? Very rarely do leaders think about such minor interactions to be influencers. Try being really interested in your team mates and the small stories they might share with you. To measure your influence observe if your team whole-heartedly buys-in to your thoughts and ideas or to the objectives you have charted out together? Influence doesn’t need you to be the CEO really. Influence comes from unspoken respect and genuine intentions that you radiate through the smallest of actions.

Partnerships last. Jobs are temporary.

Coming up tomorrow - Step 3: Exhibit unquestionable integrity

Step 1 - Becoming Super Leaders - Think differently

STEP 1: Think differently and rapidly move to action. 

A while back I wrote about not doing what's popular. The first step here resonates with that same idea. Try not to toe the line, follow the herd, try too hard to conform, or blend in with the crowd. Trying to be just like others means we are trapped in our comfort zone. That's why it's called a comfort zone, because stepping out of it is like walking out in a dress you are uncomfortable wearing and not used to. Super leaders pave the way - first of themselves, and by example, for others.

The Challenge: Comfort zones come naturally to human beings. However, comfort zones are dangerous places to be in today's rapidly changing times. The skill you are great at today might not be needed three years down the line, or there might be too many others who can do what only a few can do today.

The Key: Innovate around your core strength and come up with a new application for what you are great at. That's a potent combination for a leader.

3 Practical ideas:  
Get comfortable with the uncomfortable. Seriously. This sounds like a cliche, but I have experienced it in my own career. Try not to shy away from things you have never done before. If you don't do them now, you might find it even tougher to do them two years down the line. Maybe, the latest promising initiative in your team is not your cup of tea. Ask yourself, why not? What's holding you back from doing something that might mean your future success and growth. You might still choose to not participate, but at least know your reasons clearly. 

Step up on innovation. We often get lazy about innovation because it's so much easier to do what we are already good at. If it helps you to motivate yourself, then let me say - it's a dangerous to  not change. A young, bright person bursting with new ideas might make you redundant before you know. Let's say, you give a stock presentation to your customer. And that's what you are supposed to do. Even then, what might be the results if you sat in a quiet place with the boring presentation and did two things: a) Figure out three recommendations to make the presentation engaging, more relevant, and a better sell to the client, and b) Sincerely ask yourself what can you do personally to make the job less boring and repetitive for yourself. Could you gather more data on the client and customize it as you spoke? Is there space for some quick anecdote to engage the client than point at slides endlessly?
 
Get moving. Let me underline this point. Nothing changes in life as long as we only talk about it during our tea-time huddles. My mantra is to act on what appeals to me greatly. I felt from my heart that I wanted to express myself through more than one medium, and this blog came about. I am not doing anything very difficult when I write this blog. But the decision to create this a/c, understand how it works, decide on my themes and actually write around them....took some real effort. Though it was all enjoyable because this is what I wanted to do.

Action is so much easier when we commit to bring our ideas into reality. And action that is innovative and adds value is a mark of a person leading themselves well.

PS: It will be great to hear what you think about this first step. Please feel free to write a comment in the space at the bottom of this blog. And I promise to respond.

Coming up tomorrow - Step 2: Create successful partnerships in your immediate team

The Ten Steps to Super Leadership...

I am here to keep my promise today. I had written a blog called 'Super Leadership' and talked about ten steps to super leadership. I am starting a series from today where I will be talking in detail about each step and how we can strengthen each of them to reach this exciting phase of leading ourselves and others.

First things first. Here is the older post to jog your memory:

I am very excited as I sit down to write this blog. It just fills me up with awe what new knowledge can do to our performance. Let me introduce you to a new term, 'SUPER LEADERSHIP'. I like to define super leadership as leadership that goes beyond traditional definitions of leadership. It is a trap in today's turbulent times to stick to the age old idea of leadership and try to accomplish just that at the workplace. No wonder so many good managers/leaders find themselves failing at their good attempts at great team work. Super leadership requires 10 distinct behaviors 1) to think differently and rapidly move to action 2) create partnerships in your immediate team rather than treat them like followers 3) exhibit unquestionable integrity 4) create business in tough times, come up with revolutionary streams of business 5) treat your department as your own business venture 6) be entrepreneurial than just an employee 7) forge unimaginable tie-ups with competitors and rivals 8) have a life of your own and personal space 9) have wisdom about not just your own area, but about your organization as a whole, and lastly 10) make every single person on your team benefit from success. Lookout for my detailed blogs on each step! Happy leading until then...and do give a thought to what I wrote here.

I read into the night yesterday....

I read till 1:15 am last night! After ages. And had no regrets when I struggled to wake-up today morning with slightly gritty eyes. It was all worth recapturing the joy of reading fiction late into the night and having the right atmosphere for that gory murder I knew was coming....

My husband gifted me Dan Brown's, The Lost Symbol (a hardcover at that) when it got released. And I started on it day before. This would have been sacrilege ten years ago when I would devour new books even if it meant staying up till 3 am...or beyond. Nope, that's not ideal at all....but heck, these were un-put-downable JK Rowlings, Dan Browns, John Grishams, Alistair McLeans,Jeffery Archers, Daphne du Mauriers, Agatha Christies, and ......Hardy Boys, Nancy Drews, and....Famous Fives and Secret Sevens! Yup! Together with countless comics, and hundreds of other random fiction.

Then suddenly, I woke up one day and realized I had grown older, and had a job to go to that sucked all energy out of me. Reading sat in the last row in the least priority class-room. Those were sad days!

Yet there is an unmistakable and stupendous sense of satisfaction of having gone down the crazy reading lane that knew no bounds, esp., no time-lines, bottom-line, top-lines, or any other dubious stuff we make our life's purpose to plod through.

Then a stroke of luck happened. I found an eclectic and committed reader in my husband who revived my joy for books, intense reading, pointless discussions, endless debates, and book shopping sprees - the joys of life. We excitedly caught-up on many notes, anecdotes, memories, and the thrill of reading our favourite authors. Together, we rummaged through dusty second-hand book stores, erupting with excitement on having found a book title that seemed impossible to have got published in the first place. Over time, we also had fun exchanging some of our unique reading interests that the other hadn't tasted yet.

Thankfully, some of our most enchanted discussions at home are around discoveries and learning, and spying new places in our small apartment to fit in more book-shelves.

When we recently moved into our second home, the first carton I looked for was the one with books. Which, btw, was meticulously marked, and so what, if we found my comb with the kitchen utensils. The first shelf I lovingly arranged was our book-shelf. And the most animated times while painstakingly packing our stuff (and doubting the whole move) was which books to leave behind and which to transfer to our other home.My best memories of packing and moving in the last two years have been - without a doubt - our collective books.

Somewhere down the line, catching up with management literature became important, and I read up frantically, so I could have meaningful things to say in a training session. That was important as well.

But now...once again....it's time to get back to fiction as well....I might not find a quotable quote to impress my training junta....but then, management books never kept me awake till 1:15 am either!

The joys of reading!

What Nirvana means to me...

I've used the big N word in the title of my very first book - 'Nirvana.' I am sure to be asked what the word means for me. I don't mind saying that the journey of writing the book taught me the real meaning of Nirvana. I don't think I knew it when I started out or even chose to name the book, 'Corporate Nirvana.'

Nirvana means for me a few simple things - to be at peace with what I have, to enjoy the present moment, to treat this day I am a part of with respect and joy in my heart. And I do feel that joy, because I am alive, able to move around and do things on my own, not have to worry about four square meals a day, and live in a house that I can call home. I feel fortunate because I have so much to be happy about and therefore, so little to crib about. I know I live in a democracy and not under slavery or destitution of any kind, so I can go about doing my business everyday with my head held high. Wouldn't you say those are a hell lot of reasons to smile and get through the day like a star!

I feel like an absolute star on a daily basis - on the inside. I have begun to understand this delicious paradox of what it means to be happy. This is my share of discovery - the more we have and get, the less likely we are to be happy and contented. Sounds downright silly. And do let me know if you grossly disagree!

That doesn't mean I say  no to the good stuff that is dropping in my lap, lets say. But when it does drop - I know for sure that that particular stroke of good fortune is not a compulsory part of my being happy that day. Even if it didn't happen, I had all that I needed to be happy on that day!

Profound stuff this. For me, that is. Taken a long time to get this far in my head.  

So, I wake up each morning, and stretch and thank God that I have everything I need today to make me insanely happy. A moment of personal Nirvana looks like that to me.

Don't do what's popular

Hello to everyone....which is in order considering the long time I've  been away from blogging. Not that I was a die hard one to begin with. I started a blog because I was curious to see what the hungama was all about. But my heart was not in it, so I couldn't sustain it, I guess.

And that's been a huge discovery for me in the last two years. Don't do things under the pressure of everyone else doing them! What doesn't come from your heart will never sustain itself - it doesn't matter if it's the brightest, smartest idea in the world. When you are tempted to do things that are popular rather than original - run!

Love what Oscar Wilde said - "Be yourself, everyone else is taken." What a stunning quote.

In which ever profession you might be, your audience still loves a dash of originality. So, a bunch of us could be trainers, but we all need to have our individual spark - something we are gifted to do, and so we do it the 'our own special way'. Or we have practiced something to an extent that we stand out when we do that something. Apply the same philosophy to your job as a banker, accountant, teacher, doctor or social activist. The principle doesn't change - 'originality wins hands down'.

And though I feel strongly about being ourselves, I don't steer clear of things that other people inspire me to do. I enjoyed reading some blogs, and thought - why not? When we feel inspired, we might still do something that is popular, but do it in a way that would be unique to us.

With this stint of mine in the blogworld, I might be here for the long haul. Because this time around - I really have something to say and a will to share it with all of you!